“Well I must say you have a most impressive library,” said Sir John, looking around the bookshelves.

Lord Arlington started wildly about the room.

“Wait, wait,” he said, “they’ll do something.”

“These ‘they’,” said Sir John. “What are they exactly? What do they want?”

“What do they want?” said Lord Arlington. “They want to drive me from my home, but they won’t, they won’t.”

“Do you know why they want to do that?” said Sir John.

“Isn’t it obvious?” said Lord Arlington. He pointed suddenly. “Look, look.”

Sir John looked and saw that two of the walls had extended, seemingly to infinity. He snapped on his strange goggles again and looked down the length of it. He tutted, then pulled out another device that looked like a fat gun.

“This is a cryptozoetropometer,” said Sir John. “It can detect all manner of living creatures. Since the ectoscopic glasses are showing nothing, again. I thought I’d try this.”

“What’s it called?” said Lord Arlington, looking perplexed.

“It’s a cryptozoetropometer,” said Sir John and then sighed when he saw the confusion on Lord Arlington’s face. “Also known as an omega device.”

“Oh!” said Lord Arlington and looked relieved at that. Sir John pointed the device down the infinite corridor. A frown formed on Sir John’s face.

“Still nothing, I wonder…” he said and walked to the bookshelves. 

He glanced at a few books before spotting one.

“Oh you have an original copy of Tamerlane ” said Sir John. “That’s rather rare.”

He walked past a large vase and a suit of armour and stopped at another bookshelf.

“And another one,” said Sir John. He walked further down past another large vase and suit of amour before stopping.

“And a third!” he said. He picked up the third copy then walked back towards Lord Arlington. Lord Arlington in turn pointed behind Sir John.

“Look!” said Lord Arlington. “Look! Look!”

Sir John looked behind and saw what Lord Arlington was pointing at. In the far distance books were starting to fly off the shelves. It looked like a literary tsunami as books crashed into a great wave, heading toward them. Sir John glanced down at the bookshelf either side of the vase and suit of armour, before turning to Load Arlington.

“Tell you what old chap,” he said. “Let’s run!”

Both men ran as fast as they could to the door. But the door was no longer there, it was just another book shelf. Sir John put the book he was holding in a gap on this shelf and turned round.

“Is there another door?” he said,

Lord Arlington was gibbering again and the flying book wave was getting closer.

Sir John looked at the wall opposite and saw a door. He grabbed Lord Arlington and ran towards it. A few books were starting to fly around their ears, harbingers of the greater oncoming wave.

“No, no!” cried Lord Arlingon as Sir John tried to pull him through the next door. “That’s the billiards room.”

Sir John sighed and gave the man a sharp tug and they fell through the door just as the storm of books arrived.

Infinite Library